Fallen
by LazalotAnreads
Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 001

"Dude, do you see that?" Embry pointed over the dashboard. "I think it's moving!"

Jacob looked in the direction his friend was pointing. Though it was dark, he could see as clearly as if it were day, and he slammed on the brakes and threw open the door. "It's Bella!" he yelled over his shoulder as he ran to the love of his life.

When he saw her, it took everything he had to keep from phasing. If Bella hadn't needed him, he wouldn't have been able to do it. She was huddled in the fetal position, sobbing like the world was ending. For all he knew, maybe it was.

"Bella." He knelt beside her, but some instinct warned him not to touch her. He felt Embry at his back and said, "Dude, there's a blanket in the trunk of the Rabbit. Go get it. She's shaking and I'm pretty sure she's in shock."

"Sure, man." It only took a moment, but Embry decided to wait by the car while his friend tried to reach the girl that meant so much to him. He gave the blanket to Jacob and backed up, sitting on the hood of the Rabbit.

"Bella." Jacob raised his voice. Bella flinched, so he knew he finally had her attention. "Bella, it's Jacob. PLEASE look at me." He couldn't touch her unless she touched him first, not even to wrap the blanket around her. He didn't know why, he just knew it was true.

She turned her face in the direction of his voice and looked at him through two black eyes that were so swollen it was a wonder she could see anything at all. "J-Jacob?"

It took him a moment to swallow his rage at the state of her face and answer her, but she didn't seem to notice. "Yeah, honey, it's me. How badly are you hurt?" His voice broke on the last word.

"J-Jacob," she repeated, and reached for him like a child reaching for a parent. "Hurts." She found his bicep and gripped it with surprising force.

That was all Jacob needed. Carefully, he pulled Bella into his arms and stood, not bothering with the blanket. His body heat would be enough until he got her to the emergency room. She clung to his neck, still sobbing. Her bloody face was buried in his white t-shirt, but he didn't even notice, much less care. "Easy, baby. Everything will be okay; I'm taking you to the hospital."

"NO!" Her sudden shriek almost made him drop her. "No h-hospital! No hospital, Jacob!"

Jacob didn't know what to do. "Baby, you're hurt real bad. PLEASE let me take you to the hospital to get checked out."

"No!" she sobbed, clinging to him even more tightly. She was practically strangling him, but that just didn't matter in the face of her distress. "Please, Jacob, let me s-stay with you. I-I'll be g-good, I p-promise."

His head told him to take her to the hospital anyway, but his gut told him that it was the last thing she needed. His gut had never let him down before, so he went with it. "Okay. Okay, baby, I won't take you to the hospital. You can stay with me."

He shared a glance with Embry, who nodded before grabbing the discarded blanket and throwing it back in the trunk before closing it. As Jacob slid into the backseat with Bella, he got in the driver's seat and waited until his friend gave him a nod before starting the car and driving off.

He pulled a U-turn and took them back to his late grandparents' cabin, which he and Jacob had been fixing up in hopes of moving in once they graduated. They made it there in record time; he was worried about Bella, too, after all. In his head, she was 'Jake's Girl' and always would be.

Thankfully the cabin was furnished, so they were able to put Bella in a bed. As Jacob tenderly convinced Bella to let him look her over, Embry went to the light and started turning it up - slowly. It would be less shocking for the poor girl than just flicking a light switch; he was really glad that he and Jacob had put the dimmer switches in instead.

"Okay, baby," Jacob said as he gently laid her on the bed and untangled her arms from his neck, "we're here. Now I need to check you out - I need to know how badly hurt you are, okay?"

His voice soothed her, but though she was a little calmer, there was no WAY she was going to allow her sweet Jacob to see what had become of her. "No. Please, Jacob - I don't want to." It wasn't the best argument, but it got her point across.

"I know you don't." Jacob blinked back tears as he took a step back - still holding her hand - and took in every visible bruise and cut on her body. She was a mess, and something told him that it was worse where he couldn't see. "I know you don't want to, baby, but I can't let this go. I NEED to take care of you."

Bella started to cry again. She didn't care how badly the sobs shaking her body hurt her, she needed that release. "You w-won't want to touch me after you s-see."

"Oh, shit, dude - I think she was -" Embry's mouth snapped shut as Jacob spun around and shoved him up against the wall.

"Don't say it!" he hissed, shaking his friend a little. "Just - get out of here for a little while, huh? Go have a cup of coffee or something."

Embry nodded and left the room as soon as Jacob let him go. Jacob turned back to Bella, who had curled into the fetal position again and was crying her heart out. Rubbing a hand over his face, he sat on the edge of the bed put a gentle hand on her jean-clad hip.

"Baby," he began quietly, "I will ALWAYS want to touch you, no matter what, okay? Do you trust me?"

"Y-yes." Still crying, but determined to prove that she DID, in fact, trust Jacob, she sat up and started to pull her t-shirt off.

Jacob breathed a sigh of relief and helped her undress, his body trembling as he catalogued every injury. It was as he was sliding her jeans down over her hips that he saw it, the proof of what had happened. The crotch of her jeans was stained with blood. He froze and backed away from her, unable to control the urge to phase.

He burst into his Wolf skin, already growling deeply, and stepped closer to her again. He could smell it; he'd been smelling it since he found her, he just hadn't wanted to admit it to himself. Semen. Three different scents. His Bella had been gang-raped. For several minutes all he could hear was white noise, and all he could see was red.

Then Bella's crying broke through to him. He forced himself to phase back to Human, knowing she needed her best friend - not a glorified guard dog. "I'm s-sorry! I told them not to, I said NO -"

"Bella!" Jacob pulled her into his arms, uncaring of his nudity. It occurred to him later that it wasn't really the best idea to get naked with a rape victim, but at the time he didn't even think about it. Bella didn't seem to notice, either. "Bella, honey, what are you apologizing for? You did NOTHING wrong, do you hear me? NOTHING!" He practically roared the final word.

Shocked, she stopped crying and looked up at him through her aching eyes. For a long time she didn't say anything. Then, quietly, "They r-raped me, Jacob."

A tear slid down his cheek. "I know, baby. I know, and I will find them and kill them, but right now I need to finish looking you over. Can you handle that?"

"I trust you," she said simply. He laid her back down carefully and finished removing her jeans. She had no bra or panties - he would have to send Embry back to find them and her shoes, if he could - so she was completely nude before him. Normally he would have enjoyed such a sight, but at that time it just made him sick. Who could do this to her? To HIS Bella?

Jacob checked her front first, then rolled her to check her back. When he was satisfied that she had no life-threatening injuries there, he turned her face up once more and took a deep breath, looking her in the eye as best he could. "I need to make sure you aren't bleeding too much, Bella. You know, THERE."

He expected a fight, but Bella was apparently too exhausted to argue. Instead, she simply turned her face away and spread her legs. Awed at the trust she displayed for him, he took a quick look and let out a relieved breath almost immediately. She was torn, of course, but not nearly so bad as he'd imagined. She didn't need a hospital, anyway. Thank God.

Picking her up again gently, he managed to nudge the blanket to the end of the bed with his knee. Then he laid her back down and covered her up, sitting beside her and putting his hand on her cheek. "You're going to be in pain for a while, but you were right, you didn't need the hospital." Not that he thought she would have wanted to go there even if she DID need it. "Rest now, okay? I promise, you're safe here."

"I need a shower. PLEASE, Jacob, will you help me get clean?" she begged.

He hesitated. They would be washing valuable evidence away if he did as she asked, but on the other hand, he would recognize the monsters that had done this by their scent. His nose might not hold up in court, but he wasn't planning on letting the bastards that had raped Bella live long enough to go to court anyway.

"PLEASE, Jacob," Bella begged again. "I need to be CLEAN."

"Let me fill the tub. I'll be right back to get you, okay?" She nodded and he stood quickly, grabbing a pair of spare black boxer briefs he kept there along with some other clothes and pulling them up on his way to the bathroom. He turned the tub on, being extremely careful of the temperature, and then ran out to grab his duffel bag from the car. He found his bathing supplies and lined them up on the side of the tub before going back to the bedroom - the one he'd chosen for himself after Embry had claimed the master - for Bella.

He lowered her carefully into the bathwater and helped her wet her hair. He started there, washing it twice with his Axe Excite shampoo, then picked up his soft sponge and washed the rest of her just as thoroughly with his Axe Excite shower gel. It awed him that she was letting him do this at all, let alone so soon after being raped. She really DID trust him.

She was so relaxed that she was almost asleep by the time he lifted her out of the tub and set her on her feet so that he could dry her. Emotionally and physically exhausted, she swayed from side to side, holding his shoulders as he instructed, and just stared at his beloved face - what she could see of it through her swollen eyes, anyway.

Once she was dry, he dropped the towel to the floor and lifted her into his arms again, taking her into the bedroom and gently settling her in the bed before pulling the covers up over her. "There you go, baby. All clean and dry. Now go to sleep."

"Jacob?" Sounding panicked, she reached out and grabbed his bicep, her fingernails digging into his skin hard enough to draw blood, had he been Human. "Please stay with me! I NEED you! PLEASE!"

Instead of saying anything, he slid under the covers and nudged her onto her side so that he could spoon her. He held her like that long after he heard her breathing even out in sleep, his eyes wide open, silent tears streaming down his cheeks. He held her gently but tightly, so that she wouldn't slip away, and vowed to himself and God that he would never let her be hurt again.

NEVER.


	2. Chapter 002

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 002

At one point during the night, exactly two thirty three am according to Bella's watch that he'd set on the bedside table, Embry came to stand in the open doorway. "Jake? I called your Dad, man, and he said it's fine if we want to stay up here for the next couple of weeks. Said he'd clear it with school and Sam. I didn't tell him about Bella; I just laid it on thick that we haven't had a real break since all of this bloodsucker shit started. He was totally cool about it, but he did say that he wants you to call him in the morning."

Jacob nodded at his friend. "Thanks, dude. I just don't know how we can hide this for long. Her Dad MUST be looking for her -"

"Um," Embry interrupted, "that's the other part. He IS, and when Billy asked me if I'd seen her, I told him that you'd told me that she was planning to take off for a while. When he asked why she didn't leave a note, I told him that she probably DID, and that it must have fallen or gotten lost or something. He bought it."

It was perfect. Jacob would have at least two weeks with Bella to help her heal physically and to try to convince her to go to her father and tell him the truth. He doubted he'd have much luck with that last, but he'd do what he could. "Embry, man - you're a GENIUS!"

Embry snorted. "Yeah, well, this genius is going to bed. It's been a hell of a night." That said, he vanished down the hallway toward his bedroom.

Jacob spent the rest of the night watching over Bella. Every time she started to whimper or cry, he would whisper soothing words in her ear and stroke her hair until she subsided.

He knew the instant she awoke. It was just starting to get light out and the birds were singing their morning songs. She didn't say anything, though, so he kept his mouth shut as well. She would talk when she was good and ready.

After several long moments, she did. "Where are we, Jacob?" Her voice was hoarse from hours of crying, and before that, hours of screaming. But she wasn't going to think about that, not yet.

"We're at Embry's grandparents' cabin in Seattle. Wait here, I'm going to get you a glass of water." With a soft kiss to the top of her head, he slid out of bed and quickly got a glass of ice water from the kitchen.

When he got back to their room, Bella was sitting up, using the blanket to cover her nudity. Her hands were shaking too badly to hold the glass herself, so he held it for her and helped her take several big sips.

"Better?" he asked when she had finished half the glass. He set it on the bedside table next to her watch and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Yes. Are Embry and his grandparents here, too?" She scooted closer to his warmth, and he wrapped his arms around her. She sighed in what sounded like relief and immediately relaxed into his embrace.

"Embry is. His grandparents passed away a couple of years ago, though, so it's just the three of us for the next two weeks." Jacob proceeded to tell her everything that Embry had told him the night before. "So nobody is going to be looking for you any time soon as long as you call Charlie once in a while."

"Good." Bella's voice was dull. "I'll call him later today."

"Okay." There was an awkward silence during which Jacob tried to figure out what the next logical step would be. It didn't take him very long. "Do you, uh, do you want to get dressed?"

"Do you have anything that will fit me?" she asked.

"One of my t-shirts will probably cover you until I can send Embry on a supply run. Will that do?"

For a moment, Bella didn't reply. Then, in a whisper, she asked, "C-can I wear something you've worn? Something that smells like you?"

Though he didn't really understand the request, he quickly agreed and made a short trip out to the car to carry the rest of he and Embry's things inside. He found her a reasonably clean black t-shirt in the laundry bag and took it and the first aid kit back to their bedroom.

He hadn't bothered with the first aid kit the night before because Bella had been somewhat hysterical, but there was no avoiding it today. "Bella," he began when he got back to their room, "I'm going to need you to lie on your stomach so I can disinfect the cuts on your back."

"Okay." She did as he asked, burying her face in the pillow and trying not to think about how those cuts had gotten there.

Jacob tried to be as quick and as gentle as possible, but he knew it must have hurt anyway. She never even flinched, though, which was a bit concerning. When he was finished, he told her to stay where she was. "I'm going to rub some salve into your bruises now. Tell me if I press too hard or if it hurts too much, okay?"

"Okay," she replied quietly.

He did her entire back side, even her butt once he had her permission. Then he turned her over and, starting with her face, rubbed some of the salve everywhere he saw bruising except for her breasts and inner thighs. "Okay," he said, a touch nervously. "Okay. Um, you might want to do the rest yourself."

"I can't see," she pointed out. Her eyes had swollen completely shut overnight. "You'll have to do it. It's okay, Jacob. I trust YOU."

So he took a deep breath and started rubbing the salve into the finger shaped bruises on her breasts as carefully as he could. Then he did her inner thighs, taking the opportunity to make sure she had stopped bleeding from her most intimate place, which she had. He breathed a sigh of relief, wiped his hands off on his boxer briefs, and helped her into the t-shirt. "There! How do you feel?"

"Like I want to die," Bella answered honestly. She laid back down and turned onto her side, facing away from him.

Jacob snarled at her back. "Don't you say that! Don't you EVER say that!"

Bella sighed tiredly and reached behind her, patting the bed. "Lay with me, Jacob. I need to feel your arms around me."

Unable to deny her, he did as she bid him, curling against her back and wrapping his arm around her slim waist. He kissed her tangled hair and did his best not to start crying. He was afraid that if he started, he wouldn't be able to stop. "I can't face a world without you in it," he whispered hoarsely.

Bella wasn't sure what to say to that, so she didn't say anything. Instead, she reached down and laced her fingers with Jacob's over her stomach. Not long after, she fell asleep.

Embry stopped at their door at around eleven am. "I'm going to make some tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. She needs to eat something, and so do you. I'll call when they're ready." He walked off without waiting for a reply.

Jacob gently shook Bella awake. "Embry's making lunch, honey. Tomato soup and grilled cheeses. As I recall, that's one of your favorites."

"I'm not hungry," she mumbled, snuggling back against him. He was so warm. "Let me sleep."

"You can't sleep forever, baby," Jacob replied sadly, "and you HAVE to eat. At least a little bit. Please? For ME?"

Bella sighed and would have rolled her eyes if they hadn't been swollen shut. "My throat hurts," she tried.

"Hot tomato soup would probably make it feel better. You don't have to eat any grilled cheeses."

"I can't SEE. How am I supposed to eat?"

"I'll feed you."

"You have an answer for everything, don't you?" Bella sighed again, resigned. "Fine. If you want to feed me tomato soup, who am I to argue?"

Jacob smiled. "Do you want to eat in here or in the kitchen with Embry?"

"Here?" It came out sounding more like a question than a statement. "I just don't know what to say to Embry. I mean, he KNOWS."

"I know, too, and you don't have any problem talking to me," Jacob pointed out, slightly puzzled.

"That's different. You're my Jacob." She found his hand and squeezed it. "You take care of me."

Tears sprung to Jacob's eyes and he blinked forcefully, refusing to let them fall. Though her words would have made little sense to anyone else, he understood them perfectly. He WAS her Jacob, and he DID take care of her. Unable to help himself, he whispered, "I love you, baby. I'll ALWAYS take care of you."

Before, she would have gotten uncomfortable and pulled away, but now she just relaxed even more against him and said, "I know, Jacob." He didn't understand the change, but as long as it helped him to help her, he was all for it.

"Lunch is ready!" Embry called from the kitchen.

Jacob kissed the top of Bella's head and slid out of bed, helping her sit up before going to the kitchen to get their lunch. "Hey, man," he said as he walked in.

"Hey," Embry replied. He pointed to a tray on the table. On it were several grilled cheese sandwiches and two thermoses undoubtedly filled with tomato soup. "I thought it might be easier for her to drink it instead of trying to eat it the usual way."

"You were listening to us," Jacob accused.

"Wolf ears, remember? Besides, I'm just looking out for you, bro." Embry tried to shrug it off.

"I know, and I appreciate it, but please play some music or something from now on and TRY to give us our privacy. I don't want you to hear anything she might tell me in confidence."

"Fine, I won't listen in." Embry didn't sound like he cared one way or the other. Once again, he pointed to the tray. "Now go eat lunch with your girl."

So Jacob did. Bella was grateful for the thermos, glad not to have to let her best friend feed her. "Tell Embry I said thank you."

"I will." Jacob watched her drink, mindlessly eating his sandwiches. To his happiness, Bella drank the whole thing. "Thanks, Bells," he said as he was getting ready to take the tray back to the kitchen.

Bella's breath caught, and if it were possible, her eyes would have filled with tears. "You called me 'Bells'," she breathed.

Jacob was confused. "I've always called you 'Bells', Bells."

"You really DO still love me!" Bella sobbed.

Jacob put the tray on the floor and sat down beside her, pulling her into his arms. She climbed all of the way into his lap, straddling him and hugging his neck as her body shook. "Oh, baby, of COURSE I still love you. You need to understand that nothing is ever going to change that."

"Nothing?" Her voice was so tiny that he would not have heard it at all if it weren't for his being a Werewolf. "Even though I'm broken?"

"Oh, Bells." He held her tight against him, firmly ignoring the way her bare pussy felt against his bare thigh. As long as it didn't bother her - which it seemed it didn't - then it didn't matter. His cock didn't even twitch, held down by the knowledge of what had been done to her. "You could grow a dick and I'd STILL love you."

To both Jacob's and Bella's own surprise, she laughed. It was by no means the happy sound of before, but it was a laugh, and Jacob would take it.

Grabbing a handful of tangled hair in one hand, he gently tugged her head back so that he could look at her face. "Now how about I get a brush and we comb this rat's nest you call hair out."

A weak smile danced at the corners of her mouth. "Okay. But I'm not moving."

So he just grinned and hugged her for a while longer.


	3. Chapter 003

_Title: Fallen_

_Author: Lazalot_Anreads_

_Beta: None_

_Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob_

_Rating: NC-17_

_Challenge: None_

_Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her._

_Notes: Rape, New Moon AU_

_Chapter 003_

_They'd been sitting like that for a while when Embry made his appearance in the doorway to their bedroom. "Hey, Jake. Hey, Bella. I just wanted to know if I need to get anything besides groceries and clothes while I'm out?"_

"_A toothbrush?" Bella asked quietly. She was a little bit tense in Embry's presence - Jacob could feel her body stiffen with stress - but she played it off, so he didn't say anything._

"_Sure thing, Ms. Swan," Embry replied in a light, teasing tone. "Anything else?"_

"_Nah, dude, we're good," Jacob said when Bella didn't add anything else. "Do you need money?"_

_Embry shook his head and patted his right pocket. "Got it covered, bro."_

_He left and Jacob finally set Bella aside and got out of bed, going to grab a brush from his bag. He brought it back and sat Indian style on the bed behind her, then, starting at the bottom, he tenderly worked the tangles out of her long dark hair. Once they were gone, though, he kept brushing._

_After awhile Bella moaned and leaned back against him, making it impossible for him to continue. "I love you, Jacob Black."_

_Jacob's heart swelled and he found himself blinking back tears for what seemed to be the hundredth time since he'd found Bella on the side of the road the night before. "I love you, too, sweetheart."_

"_Can we lay down? I hurt." Without waiting for an answer, Bella shoved and tugged at Jacob, maneuvering the both of them so that they were lying on their sides facing away from the open door. "Thanks," she said when she was comfortable._

_Jacob chuckled lightly. "Don't thank me. You're the one who put me where you wanted me."_

"_Mm … Whatever." Bella was already beginning to doze. "Stay," she ordered him absently as she sank into slumber. As if he could ever leave her._

_Jacob shook his head and sighed. So far things were going okay, but he didn't expect that to last very long. His Bella had been raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road. It was going to take a lot of time and patience to help her through this chapter of her life._

_He wished he had a computer so that he could research rape victims, but even if he had happened to have one, there would have been no internet access. Since he and Embry didn't actually live there yet, they saw no need to pay for the internet, though they did have cable and a landline. Shit. He wished he'd thought to ask Embry to stop at the library and do some research._

_Jacob was in luck, though, because Embry had the same idea. He came home not only with groceries, toiletries, and clothes, but with two books and several sheets of printer paper all about rape victims. Jacob started reading immediately, sitting up in bed beside Bella, who had woken up when Embry brought her stuff into the room._

_Though she couldn't see what he was reading due to her swollen eyes, she could still clearly hear the pages turning. "What book are you reading, Jacob? Will you read it to me?"_

_EDIT!Jacob wasn't about to lie to her. "I don't think you want to hear this, Bella. It's about rape victims - I want to know how to help you heal from this." He held his breath. She would either be mad or she wouldn't; it was a fifty-fifty chance._

_She didn't get mad, but she was quiet for a long moment. Finally, though, she said, "Oh. Okay." They left it at that._

_He read for hours, stopping only when Bella needed something from him. He made quick work of the printer paper and started on the first book, which took a bit longer to read. By the time he finished reading it, his head hurt and he was nauseous, but it was all worth it in his opinion. He still didn't feel like he knew what he was doing, but he at least had some idea of what Bella was going through. That made it easier to help her._

_For dinner, Bella agreed that they should join Embry in the dining room. Jacob helped her dress in a pink tank top with butterflies on it and a pair of dark jeans, then they left the room. She was quiet and a little bit tense, sticking close to Jacob, but it was progress. While Jacob and Embry ate hamburgers and fries, Bella sipped from her thermos filled with chicken noodle soup._

"_Don't forget to call your Dad, Bella," Embry said at one point. He knew she hadn't called Charlie yet because there was only one phone, in the kitchen, and Embry had been in there the whole time._

"_Oh, right." Bella didn't sound very enthusiastic, but neither boy blamed her. "Get me the phone and dial the number for me. I might as well get it over with."_

_Embry got the phone and handed it to Jacob, who dialed the number before handing it to Bella. Bella waited patiently for her father to answer._

"_Hello?" Charlie sounded stressed out._

"_Hi, Dad," Bella said._

"_Bella! Young lady, don't you EVER run off without telling me again!" Charlie sounded more relieved than angry._

"_I left a note," Bella lied easily. "Listen, I just need some time to myself. I'll probably be home in a couple of weeks."_

"_I understand you need space, but I wish you'd have at least taken Jake with you." Charlie sighed. "Then I'd KNOW you were safe."_

_Bella wished she could tell her Dad that she WAS with Jacob, to reassure him, but she knew it would ruin everything if she did. "I'll be fine, Dad. Look, I was just calling to check in. I'm going to go now. Love you."_

"_Love you, too," Charlie said gruffly._

_Bella hung up. "Jacob, will you help me take a shower?"_

_Jacob almost choked on a fry, but managed to swallow it just in time. Embry smirked at him. "Sure, sure."_

_They finished their dinner in silence, then Jacob helped Bella down the hallway and into the bathroom. He turned on the shower and stripped, then turned to help her undress. He grimaced at the sight of her, feeling rage well up inside him once again. He shoved it aside and helped Bella into the shower, climbing in after her._

_He washed her body tenderly but politely, then turned washing her hair into a head massage. She moaned, and his dick twitched, but he ignored it. He finished washing her hair and then quickly washed himself before helping her out of the shower. He toweled her dry first, and then himself. Then he led her into their bedroom._

_Bella laid down and let Jacob once again disinfect her wounds and rub the bruise salve into her. He was tentative when he reached her breast, but she didn't say anything, so he went ahead and did it._

_He helped her dress in a red tank top and white shorts, then he dressed himself in a black t-shirt and black boxers. He sat her down on the bed and then climbed up beside her._

"_How are you feeling, Bells?" Jacob asked._

"_Honestly?" Bella sighed. "I feel like shit, Jacob. I feel like this was my fault. Logically, I know it wasn't, but I can't help the way I feel."_

"_I hate that you feel that way." Jacob suddenly growled loudly. "I HATE this! I HATE that this happened to you! I love you SO much and I don't know how to help you and I HATE this!"_

"_Come here." Bella held her arms out to embrace him, turning her head in the direction his voice had come from._

_Jacob took her in his arms and laid down so that they were facing each other, cuddled close together. "I love you SO much. I know you don't want to hear it, and I'm sorry, but when I see you like this … I just have to say it. I feel so MUCH that I have to let it out somehow."_

"_Jacob, I do want to hear it," Bella protested. "After - well, I NEED to hear it. Besides, I told you earlier, I love you too."_

"_Yeah, but you don't mean it in the same way." Jacob heard the bitterness in his own voice and could have kicked himself. She didn't need this now!_

_She was silent for a moment. When she spoke, her voice was shy. "When IT happened, I - I was actually on my way to tell you - to tell you that I'm in love with you."_

_Jacob's heart wrenched painfully. "You don't know what you're saying, Bella."_

_Frustrated, Bella reached up and pinched his nipple hard enough to make him yelp. "I'm serious, damn it! I'm in LOVE with you and you can either return the emotion or you can leave me but you WON'T just dismiss my feelings as nothing!"_

_Jacob cringed, feeling terrible. He said the only thing he could. "I'm in love with you, too, you know that. But now isn't really the best time for this, and you know it."_

"_I'm sorry!" Bella started to cry. "I can't help the way I feel! But you don't believe me, and I don't know what to do!"_

"_Oh, Bells." He sighed and tugged her closer. "I'm not trying to be a jerk. I'm just saying it's too soon after what happened for you to be declaring your undying love for me."_

"_I didn't say it was undying," Bella grumbled into his chest. Then, "It is, though. I'll love you until the end of my days, Jacob Black."_

_Jacob decided not to bother arguing any more. "I love you until the end of my days as well, Bella Swan." It was the truth._

_There was a light knock and Jacob invited Embry in. He came to stand beside the bed on Bella's side, a couple of black notebooks and a fountain pen in his hands. "I know you can't see right now, Bella, but I got you these notebooks and the pen so you could write when your eyes are better."_

_She held out her hands for the items and he placed them in them. "Thank you so much, Embry," she said, touched by the thoughtful gift. "I'll DEFINITELY put them to good use."_

"_Cool." Embry smiled at them and left, closing the door behind them._

"_That was really nice of him." Bella sounded a little choked up. "I wish I could write in them now."_

"_Well, how about you tell me what you want to say and I write for you?" Jacob suggested. Then he held his breath. He was asking her to REALLY trust him, more even than she already had._

"_I don't know," Bella said quietly. Jacob's heart sunk. "Could you let me think about it for a while?"_

"_Sure, sure." Jacob just knew she wasn't going to do it. It was way too personal. He changed the subject. "Are you going to tell Charlie what happened to you when you go home?"_

"_NO!" Bella cried. She gripped his bicep with surprising strength. "You can't tell him either, Jacob! PROMISE ME!"_

"_Okay, I promise," Jacob told her, not at all surprised by her demand. "But I still want you to know that I think you SHOULD tell him."_

_Bella relaxed and loosened her grip on him. "I hear you, but I just CAN'T. Please leave it alone, Jacob."_

_Jacob sighed and kissed the top of her head. "Of course. I love you so MUCH, baby. Don't you know by now that I'll give you anything you ask for?"_

_Bella smiled and cuddled closer to him, actually sliding one of her legs between his. "I love you, too. You don't have to believe me, but Jacob, I would DIE for you. I would - I would KILL for you!"_

"_I'm going to kill for you, Bella," Jacob reminded her. His voice had hardened. "I can't let this go, what they did to you. I know their scents and I'm going to hunt them down and kill them as soon as I know that you're okay."_

"_Shush, Jake," Bella whispered, petting his chest through his t-shirt. "I know. Now come on, I'm tired. Let's sleep." She turned around so that her back was against his chest and he was spooning her. "Mm. Much better. I always feel SO safe in your arms, Jacob."_

_Jacob blinked back tears. He didn't say anything; he just squeezed her briefly and then watched over her as she slept._


	4. Chapter 004

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 004

_**Entry 001 - Sunday, October 10, 2010**_

_**This past Friday night was the absolute worst of my life. I hope it holds that title; I couldn't imagine going through something worse than IT. The rape.**_

Bella paused to take a deep breath. "Jacob, this is a really ugly story. You don't have to listen to it. I could just wait and write it down myself when my eyes get better."

Jacob frowned and started tapping the pen against the notebook. "I can handle it, Bella, I promise. I just … I NEED to know. If you can't talk about it right now then I understand that, but if you're just trying to protect me … well, don't."

"I just don't want this to change anything between us," Bella said quietly, too quietly for normal ears.

Jacob put the pen down and sat up, touching her cheek tenderly. "You're my Bells. I can't say that this won't change things between us, but … I like to think it will make us closer. Please, Bella. I'm strong enough. Let me be the one you lean on."

"You already are." A faint smile touched her lips, but disappeared as quickly as if it had never been there. "Okay. Pick up the pen."

_**I'd decided to go for a walk. There were some things I'd been trying to work out in my mind and I thought some fresh air might help. I was almost at Jacob's when I realized how far my feet had carried me.**_

_**I remembered that Jacob had gone off somewhere with Embry, so I turned back. But it was a two hour walk and now that I wasn't lost inside my own head, I could feel the ache in my feet. That's when I saw the truck.**_

_**It was a familiar ice blue Ford, obviously brand new with all the bells and whistles. Two boys I didn't know personally but had seen around sat on the hood, watching me with the strangest smiles. It gave me the creeps, and I turned again, deciding to run the rest of the way to the reservation even though Jacob wasn't there.**_

_**I ran right into his arms. Tyler Crowley, who I hadn't spoken to since the prom mix-up, grabbed me around the waist and tried to kiss me. I managed to shove him away the first time, but then the other two guys grabbed me by the arms and held me still for him to try again. So I bit his tongue hard enough to draw blood and spit it in his face when he reared back in pain.**_

_**That just made him angry. He looked me over with a cold, sick glint in his eye that told me EXACTLY what he was thinking. I started struggling even more, but I was just too weak and the guys holding me were just too strong. So I started screaming.**_

_**They just laughed and told me to go ahead, that there was nobody around to hear me. I shut my mouth, then. I had some weird idea in my head that I'd just stop responding and that would make them leave me alone. I was SO wrong.**_

"Jacob, would you get me a glass of water?" Bella's voice shook. "My throat hurts and I need a break."

Jacob jumped up eagerly, feeling like he could use a break, too. He got a bottle of water for her and a can of cherry coke for himself before returning to the bedroom and climbing back up onto the bed so that he could sit beside her. They sipped their drinks, each of them lost in their own thoughts.

Bella was thinking about the rape and all of the emotions talking about it had brought to the surface. Though she continued to speak calmly, a veritable emotional BOMB seethed just beneath her skin. Pain, loss, and sadness were all wrapped up with rage and hatred and she didn't even know any more which emotion was which. They all felt angry to her.

Jacob was thinking about Tyler Crowley and his friends. He knew he would have to kill them in his wolf skin so that nobody would connect the deaths to him. He knew he wanted to torture them first, but he wasn't sure yet just HOW he was going to torture them. They deserved to be raped, but he knew he didn't have the stomach for something like that, so he was going to have to get creative.

"Okay, I'm ready," Bella finally said, her voice catching a little.

Jacob immediately set his drink aside and picked up the pen. "Go ahead."

_**Tyler stripped me, ripping both my bra and my panties in his rush to get to my naked body. I shivered in the cold and my nipples hardened automatically. He decided that must mean that I WANTED him to - to do what he did to me, and his friends agreed.**_

_**Tyler started hitting me in the face, calling me names like 'slut' and 'whore'. It hurt like HELL, especially when he aimed for my eyes, but I didn't so much as whimper. I was proud of that until he slid his belt off and walked around behind me. I screamed each time the buckle hit my back - there was no stopping it. The pain was INTENSE.**_

_**At some point I heard the belt drop to the ground and I sighed in relief. My knees were so weak by that time that the only things holding me up anymore were his two thugs. Then they dropped me, and I landed on my hands and knees.**_

_**Before I even had time to THINK about running, Tyler was on me. He used his knees to push my legs apart and -**_

"Stop." Jacob set the pen down with trembling fingers. "I'm sorry, Bella, I just need a minute to get control of myself."

"YOU need to get control of YOURSELF?" Bella clenched her fists so hard that her nails broke the skin of her palms. "I'M the one who was fucking RAPED! Quit acting like this affects you so DAMN much when we both know you don't really give a SHIT!"

Jacob growled at her. He couldn't help it; how DARE Bella try to say that he didn't CARE? Of COURSE he cared! HIS Bella had been beaten and raped by rich white kids while HE'D been goofing off with Embry and it was all his FAULT! Suddenly, he deflated. Maybe Bella had realized that it was his fault, and that was why she was suddenly so angry with him. "I'm SO sorry I wasn't there to protect you, Bella," he said quietly.

"Oh, I see." Bella's voice was like ice. "Big Bad Jacob feels guilty that he wasn't there to once again save Meek Mousy Bella from her own stupidity, so now he's taking care of her as penance. I should have known it would be something like that. Always have to be the hero, don't you, Jacob?"

Something broke inside him. Rolling off the bed and onto his feet, he turned in a strangely graceful move and hit the wall so hard that he left a hole in it. He didn't give a shit. "I'm not TRYING to be a fucking HERO, and I'm not here because I feel fucking GUILTY!" he yelled at the top of his lungs. "I'm here because I LOVE you more than ANYTHING and I always WILL, and I NEED to help you get THROUGH this SHIT!"

He stood, trembling but holding onto his Human skin with all of his will, waiting for some sort of sign that Bella understood where he was coming from. Waiting for her to admit that he was with her out of love, not pity. Never pity.

Finally, she cracked a smile in his direction. "Just pick up the damn pen, will you?" So he did.

_**- shoved himself inside of me, taking my virginity. I REALLY screamed then.**_

_**The rest is a little hazy. I think I was in shock. I do know that they each took several turns violating me and that when they were done, they kicked me around a bit before leaving. I remember seeing Tyler put my underwear in his pocket as they left; I suppose he wanted some kind of sick souvenir.**_

_**When they were finally gone, I crawled the short distance to my remaining clothes and pulled them back on. Then I made myself stand up, determined to get to the reservation and get some help for myself. I took a few steps, and then I fell and just curled up and cried.**_

_**Jacob found me, of course. He always does. That's how I know he really loves me.**_

Jacob put the pen down, closed the notebook, and pulled Bella into his arms. "I'm sorry I yelled, baby." He kissed her forehead and squeezed her gently. "I know this is hard for you. Maybe I shouldn't have pushed you to tell me what happened so soon after it DID happen."

"No, I'm glad you did." Bella hugged him back, resting her ear on his chest just over his heartbeat, which was strong and steady. "I needed to get it out, and I DO feel better. I'm sorry I went off on you, though. I didn't really mean the things I said. I guess I was just lashing out. I'm REALLY sorry."

"Okay, we're both sorry, then. Let's just move on, huh?" Jacob smiled even though she couldn't see it. "How about I brush your hair for a while?"

She agreed, so he got the brush out of the nightstand and, leaning back against the headboard, got her settled in the space between his legs. He started at the very bottom, slowly and patiently working the tangles out there before moving up and repeating the process. Once all of the tangles were out, he kept brushing, using long, slow strokes that relaxed them both.

There was a knock at the door. "Come in," Jacob said quietly, continuing to brush Bella's hair.

Embry came in and sat on the edge of the bed a fair distance away from Bella after he warned her of what he was doing. "Sam just called. He wanted to know why we aren't phasing. I gave him a load of bull about having a bet with you about who could go the longest without phasing, but he didn't buy it, man. I think he might come up here."

"Oh, no!" Bella gasped. She didn't want SAM of all people to find out what had happened to her! He would go to her father!

"DAMN it!" Jacob groaned and set the brush aside, pulling Bella back against his chest so that he could see Embry over her shoulder. "If he finds out what happened to Bella, he won't hesitate to go to Charlie and that's not what she wants. We need to figure out some way to either hide her while he's here, which we both know is impossible, or to make him keep his mouth shut. I won't have him telling Charlie anything. Bella's not ready."

"I'm never telling him," Bella reminded Jacob sternly.

"Well, I have an idea, but you're not going to like it." Embry's tone was dead serious.

"I'll do anything to protect Bella, you know that," Jacob replied. He pushed Bella's hair aside and kissed her shoulder. "She's my life."

"Okay, then." Embry took a deep breath. "I think you should challenge him for Alpha. We both know you'd win, easily, and then you could LITERALLY make him keep his mouth shut. Also, if you became Alpha, you could claim Bella as your Chosen and then she'd ALWAYS have one of us with her."

Jacob bit his lip. It was a great idea, but could he do it? Could he win against Sam, who had so much more experience? If he did win, could he handle the responsibility? Could he truly become the Alpha of his Pack?

For Bella, he could. He WOULD.


	5. Chapter 005

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 005

"I'll do it," Jacob said decisively. Just then he heard a car coming up the drive and both his and Embry's eyes widened at the same time. "SHIT! He's HERE!" Jacob slid out from behind Bella and, with a last kiss to the top of her head, got to his feet. "Stay with Bells," he told Embry, and went out to meet his destiny.

Sam didn't wait for an invitation; he just walked right in. Jacob found him just inside the front door, his nose in the air. "What the HELL is Bella Swan doing here?" he demanded. "Billy told me that you and Embry were alone."

"Samuel Uley," Jacob said, his head held high, "I challenge you."

The formal words and the meaning behind them took Sam off guard, but he quickly pulled himself together. "Outside, then," he said coolly, and led the way out into the front yard.

Luckily, there were no neighbors. They both stripped down and phased into their wolf skins. Then they started to circle each other, sizing each other up even though both knew that they were evenly matched.

[Why are you doing this?] Sam asked.

Jacob knew that if he was going to win this thing, he couldn't waste his energy on trying to control his thoughts, so he didn't bother. [See for yourself,] he replied.

So Sam looked at his memories of the past couple of days. Immediately, he got up on his high horse. [You should have taken her to the hospital and called her father IMMEDIATELY! What were you THINKING?]

[I was thinking about what was best for Bella,] Jacob answered. Then he lunged.

They fought for what felt like hours before Jacob finally got his mouth around Sam's throat, but in actuality it was only about fifteen minutes. They did a lot of damage to each other in that short amount of time, though. Once the Alpha power had shifted to Jacob, the phased back into their Human skins. Both were bruised and bloody.

"You're making a mistake," Sam said, cradling his broken wrist.

Jacob ignored him. "I order you to keep everything you know about Bella, Embry, and myself a secret, even from your Mate. I order you to keep the power shift a secret as well, and to act as if you were still Alpha until I get back."

"Fine," Sam snarled at him, and then he left.

Later, after Jacob had healed and taken a shower, the three of them ordered four large pizzas and chilled out in the living room in front of the lit fireplace. "Man, I am SO glad that you're Alpha now, Jake," Embry commented in the middle of his fifth slice.

"What makes you say that?" Jacob asked. He was already full, having eaten twelve slices himself. "Sam's not all THAT bad."

Embry shrugged. "It just never felt right to follow his lead. Plus, he would never listen to me when I'd try to get my shift changed. He assumed I wanted to party or goof off or whatever when I actually had something important to do, like study for a test. You know I'm failing out of ALL of my classes except gym?"

"But that's BULLSHIT!" Jacob blurted out. He couldn't believe it. "All he had to do was look in your thoughts to see that you really wanted to study. It's not like you could have possibly LIED to him! What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to keep studying my ass off, that's what." Embry's tone was matter of fact. "Taking two weeks OFF from school might actually be the only thing that saves me from failing our junior year."

"I could help you, Embry," Bella offered shyly. She grimaced. "Once I can see again, that is."

Embry was touched, but he knew that Bella needed to focus on herself and healing from what had happened to her. "Thanks, Bella, but I think you'll probably be pretty busy."

"I guess." She sighed despondently. "I just thought it'd be nice to think about something else for a change."

Embry looked at Jacob, who nodded. He grinned. "Well, I'll tell you what. When you're feeling better, Jake and I will take you out somewhere. Your pick. Anywhere you want to go."

Bella smiled. "Anywhere? Hmm …"

"Oh no! Now she's going to have us do something really LAME, like go to the ballet!" Jacob said teasingly. "Thanks a LOT, Em!"

Bella giggled, and the boys shared a grin. "Jacob Black! I would NEVER go to the ballet!" She tried to pretend that she was really offended, but her smile gave her away.

They joked around for a little while longer, both boys doing their best to make Bella laugh. Eventually, though, Embry said his goodnights and headed off to bed, leaving the two of them alone. A comfortable silence fell.

Bella was the one to break it. "So I was wondering … what did Embry mean earlier today, when he said that you could claim me as your Chosen?" The question had been haunting her all evening, but she hadn't wanted to ask it in front of Embry.

Jacob made a face that he knew she couldn't see. He'd been half expecting the question since his friend had brought the subject up, but that didn't mean that he was looking forward to answering it. What was he supposed to say? The last thing he wanted to do was make Bella uncomfortable.

He was silent for too long. "Jacob?" Bella frowned. "Is something wrong?"

Jacob sighed. "Not wrong, baby, just difficult. You're probably not going to like this very much."

"Just tell me," Bella suggested. "Maybe I'll surprise you."

"I sure hope so," he muttered, then cleared his throat. "When a Werewolf claims someone as their Chosen, they are basically saying that they plan to Mate with that person, but that they have to wait for some reason. So then the other Werewolves in his Pack watch over the Chosen until she becomes the Werewolf's Mate. Embry wants me to declare you as my Chosen so that the Pack will look after you without asking too many questions."

Bella swallowed hard. "Let me guess. A Chosen becomes a Mate when she has s-sex with the Werewolf, right?"

"Yes, but I would only be declaring you as my Chosen to protect you," Jacob rushed to explain. "I wouldn't EVER try to take you as my Mate!"

An awkward silence fell as Bella thought that through and Jacob looked everywhere but at her. It went on and on, lasting until they both wished they could just leave the room to escape it. They couldn't, of course; Bella still couldn't see and Jacob would never leave her.

Bella tried to hold the tears back, but a few escaped her swollen eyes anyway. Jacob caught the scent of salt in the air and finally looked at her. Her shoulders were shaking and she was holding her hands over her mouth, trying to hold her sobs at bay. He felt terrible.

"Oh, Bells, I'm sorry!" Jacob tried to pull her into a hug, but she wouldn't let him. He sat back on his heels, feeling sad and useless. "I didn't mean to make you cry."

Bella uncovered her mouth. "Y-you don't w-want me anymore!" she blurted out. She started to cry HARD.

"WHAT?" Jacob thought back over his words and could have kicked his own ass. "I didn't mean that I don't WANT you to be my Mate! There's nothing I want MORE! I just didn't want you to think that I would, you know, try something … funny."

"R-really?" Bella's tears began to slow down and Jacob said a silent prayer of thanks. It broke his heart to see his Bella cry, especially when she was crying over something he'd said or done. "Y-you really w-want ME?"

Jacob tried to wrap his arms around her again, and this time she let him. He pulled her close. "Of course I do. But I would NEVER take advantage of you, Bella. EVER."

"I KNOW that!" Bella snapped, pushing him away. She looked in the direction she thought his face was in. "You don't have to keep telling me that! Jacob, I KNOW that you would never do ANYTHING to hurt me, okay?"

"Okay. Can I hold you now?" He was pouting and he knew it. He hated having Bella upset for any reason, but having her upset with HIM was agonizing. "Please?"

"Lets take a shower first," she replied. "It's getting late. I mean, it MUST be getting late; Embry already went to bed a while ago."

"Sure, sure." Jacob got to his feet and helped her up, then led her down the hall to the bathroom.

Later, when they were clean and cuddled up in bed, Bella asked, "So, are you going to do it?"

"Do what?" Jacob frowned at the back of her head, confused. They were laying in the spooning position, her back to his chest.

"Are you going to claim me as your Chosen?" As soon as the last word passed her lips, Bella froze and held her breath.

Jacob felt her tension and wondered what he should say. What answer was she waiting for, hoping for? He decided his best bet would be to ask. "Do you WANT me to claim you as my Chosen, Bella?"

Bella exhaled and started breathing again. "Only if you MEAN it, Jacob."

Jacob laughed happily. "Of COURSE I mean it, Bells! Do YOU mean it? Do you REALLY want me to claim you as my Chosen, for REAL?"

"I-I don't know if I'll ever be a-able to M-Mate with you," Bella warned him with a shaky voice, "but yes, I DO want to be your Chosen, for REAL."

In the same breath, Bella had managed to both break and heal his heart. It took him a moment before he could speak normally, but once he could, he said the only words that mattered. "I, Alpha Jacob Black, choose you, Isabella Swan."

Bella smiled. "Good. Because I, Isabella Swan, also choose you, Alpha Jacob Black."

Jacob's breath caught. Though her words hadn't been necessary to cement the bond, they carried a strange sort of weight. It was almost like she was REALLY claiming HIM as HER Chosen, too. But that was impossible, so all he said was, "Thanks."

She giggled. "I feel like we just got married."

"Nah, to get married we'd have to kiss." Jacob smirked.

Bella rolled in his arms so that she was facing him and tilted her head back. "So kiss me, then."

Jacob froze, stunned. There was no way Bella Swan had just asked him for a kiss, and yet he'd heard it with his own ears. "WHAT?" he finally asked, his throat tight. "Did I hear you right?"

"If you heard that I want you to kiss me, then yes, you heard right." Bella was amused. "Will you?"

"Will I what?" He wanted to make her say it one more time, just to be sure. He had to be sure.

"Kiss me, fool!" Bella pinched his nipple lightly. "NOW."

So he lowered his head and lightly, carefully pressed his lips to hers. He kissed her so, SO tenderly, bringing tears to her eyes that she refused to let fall lest she ruin the moment. She kissed him back just as sweetly, her heart aching with love that she knew she couldn't even begin to fully express.

Bella let her lips part, hoping Jacob took the invitation to a deeper kiss. He didn't, so she brought her own tongue into play, tentatively licking his lower lip.

He broke away, breathing hard with suppressed passion. "Are you sure?"

"YES! Jacob, I am NOT going to break!" she informed him, frustrated. "Now shut up and kiss me like you MEAN it!"

So he did.


	6. Chapter 006

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 006

The next morning, Jacob opened his eyes to see Bella sleeping beside him, fully healed and with a soft smile on her perfect face. Amazed, he called for Embry in a whisper. He could hear the other boy moving around in the kitchen and knew he was up.

Embry shuffled in, still half asleep. "WHAT?" Then he saw Bella's face, and he was suddenly wide awake. His jaw dropped and his eyes popped, but all he said was, "Whoa."

"I know, right?" Jacob was still whispering. "It's like a frigging miracle, dude!"

"Is it just her face or …" Embry trailed off and raised a questioning eyebrow at his friend.

"I don't know, I haven't checked." Jacob shrugged. "I didn't want to wake her; she actually slept through the ENTIRE night without a single whimper and I saw no reason to disrupt such a HEALING sleep. Pun intended."

Embry chuckled and nodded. "You're right. We should let her sleep. Come on, you can keep me company while I make breakfast." He left the room and Jacob followed him. "Do you know what her favorite breakfast is?"

"Fried ham, boiled eggs, and cheesy hash browns," Jacob replied immediately. "Do we have the stuff for it?"

"Boiled eggs?" Embry made a face. "To each their own, I guess. Yeah, we have the stuff and I even know how to make it, so just chillax for a minute and then you can take sleeping beauty her breakfast in bed."

So Jacob grabbed a seat at the kitchen table and watched his friend cook. "How do you think she healed so fast, Em?"

"I have NO clue, bro," Embry replied, his back to Jacob as he prepared breakfast. "Normally, I'd assume you'd Mated even if you didn't tell me had, but these aren't normal circumstances. I know there's no way that you and Bella fucked last night, but I can't think of anything else that would make her suddenly heal the way she did. I'm clueless, man."

"Well, we did kiss," Jacob admitted.

Embry spun to face him, dropping an egg on the floor in the process. "Ugh. YOU can clean that up, it's your fault for startling me like that. What do you MEAN, the two of you kissed?"

Jacob grabbed some paper towels and cleaned the egg up quickly before going back to his seat. Embry waited, somewhat impatiently, but it was a long time before his friend said anything else. "She wanted me to kiss her. So I did."

"Just like that? What about the rape, man? There's no way she's ready to start a relationship with you right now." Embry went back to cooking. "Not that a kiss equals a relationship, or anything, but it does tend to start one. Was there tongue?"

Jacob, who had been in the midst of taking a drink, choked. Milk actually came out of his nose. He grabbed a napkin and wiped it away quickly. "That's none of your fucking business, man!"

Embry nodded. "So there was tongue. Jake, man, she's pushing herself too damn hard. I just don't know WHY."

Jacob didn't say anything, too busy thinking about Bella's possible reasons for kissing him the night before. Soon, her breakfast was ready and Embry laid it all out on a breakfast tray he'd recently found in the pantry before giving it to Jacob and sending him back to his and Bella's room. Embry would eat alone, but he didn't mind.

Jacob set the tray on his side of the bed and walked around to Bella's side, shaking her gently. "Wake up, baby. It's time to eat."

"No," Bella said clearly, squeezing her eyes more tightly shut and rolling over onto her stomach. "Go away."

"After all of Embry's hard work?" Jacob shook her again. "He made your favorite, Bella. The least you could do is eat it."

She groaned loudly and Jacob smiled, knowing he'd won. Guilt was always a good motivator for his Bella.

"Hey," Bella mumbled into her pillow, "I don't hurt. Why don't I hurt?"

Jacob chuckled nervously. "You seem to have healed overnight. At least, your face has."

She lifted her head and looked at him with the beautiful brown eyes he'd missed so much. Suddenly, a wide smile broke out across her face. "I can see! Shit, it's TRUE, I really DID heal overnight! How is this possible?"

"We don't know." Jacob helped her sit up and put the tray in her lap. "But that doesn't matter right now. Eat."

"Fine." She picked up her fork and called out, "Thanks, Embry!" Then she started eating, moaning when she took her first bite of cheesy hash browns. "GOD."

_**Entry 002 - Monday, October 11, 2010**_

_**When I woke up this morning, I found my body completely healed like some kind of miracle. Jacob doesn't know why it happened and neither does Embry, but personally I couldn't give a damn. I feel FANTASTIC. Physically, I mean.**_

_**Emotionally I'm still completely wrecked. Jacob and Embry help; they treat me the same as they always have, which is a HUGE relief. They tease me and make me laugh, too, which I really need right now. I honestly don't know what I'd do without them.**_

_**Jacob especially. I don't know what it is, but just being in his presence makes me feel a LOT better. It's always been that way, though, ever since we met when we were little kids. His spirit soothes mine.**_

_**Jacob claimed me as his Chosen last night, which basically means that we're betrothed. I don't think that he thinks that I'm taking this seriously, but I AM. I even claimed him back! I'm proud to be his Chosen and I'd be even prouder to be his Mate. I just don't think that I can. Just the WORD 'sex' scares the hell out of me, I'd hate to see what happened if I tried to do the actual DEED.**_

_**I HATE Tyler Crowley and his fucking thugs! Ugh, the word 'hate' is hardly adequate to express how I feel about those SLUGS. I want to tie them down and cut off their equipment with a dull knife, then I want to feed it to them. THEN I want to take a broom and ram the handle so far up Crowley's ass that he CHOKES on it. God, I could talk all day about the tortures I want to inflict on those creeps!**_

_**But I won't, because something else happened last night and I HAVE to talk about it, even if only to a book. Jacob KISSED me! With TONGUE! Of course, I had to practically MAKE him, but a kiss is still a kiss no matter what way you look at it, and THIS kiss was damn GOOD!**_

_**It started out all sweet and tender, like he thought I might bolt if he showed any real passion. But then I asked him for more, and it was like my request unleashed something within him. His lips crashed back down on mine in the most glorious, most ELECTRIFYING kiss I've ever had the pleasure of experiencing. GOD!**_

_**I love Jacob Black. It's funny, but what brought that home for me more than anything else was the rape. I remember thinking, as Crowley stole my virginity, that he'd stolen something of Jacob's. The moment I realized that I wanted to give myself to my best friend was the same moment that Crowley took me against my will. How twisted is THAT?**_

_**I told Jacob that the reason I was out that night was that I was planning to tell him that I'm in love with him. That's more or less the truth - my feet were taking me to the keeper of my heart even though my head hadn't quite caught up yet. He doesn't believe me, though, and I can tell that words aren't going to make much of a difference. So from here on out, I'm going to let my actions speak for me.**_

_**I'll show Jacob that he chose right - that, even though I can't give him sex, I can give him everything else he needs.**_

Bella closed the notebook and looked up as Jacob entered the room, a small smile gracing her features. "You look WIPED."

"I am." Bella had asked for some time to herself after she eaten her breakfast, so Jacob had joined Embry in working on the master bathroom. They'd completely gutted it and were in the process of laying down new tile when they'd both decided that it was time to call it a night. "Are you ready for your shower?"

Bella raised both of her eyebrows at the question and took a closer look at him. His eyes were half closed and he was swaying in place. There were dark circles under his eyes and his shoulders were hunched with tension. He was a mess.

Bella smiled to herself. Even though she hated to see her best friend in such a bad way, this was just the kind of opportunity she needed to take care of HIM for a change. So she made a decision.

"Yeah, I'm ready." She got to her feet and took his hand, leading him to the bathroom. What he really needed was a bubble bath, but she had no idea how to swing that without making him suspicious, so she turned the shower on instead. "Take your clothes off."

They both got naked and into the shower. When they were both wet, he picked up the shampoo and motioned for Bella to turn around so that he could wash her hair. She let him take care of her, but when he was done, she took the shower gel from him before he could wash his own body.

"What are you doing?" he asked, watching her lather up the loofah through tired eyes.

"Hush," Bella replied, starting to wash him. "Let me take care of you tonight."

It was a testament to how tired he was that he didn't even argue.

Once he was clean, she got them out of the shower and dried off, and then they took turns brushing their teeth before Bella led Jacob to bed. She tucked him in, and he was asleep by the time she was done.

Bella could hear Embry in the kitchen, so she went to see if he needed anything.

"Nah, I'm good," he told her, taking a bite of his dry apple jacks. "Just having a late night snack. You want some?" He nudged the cereal box toward her.

"No, thanks. I just brushed my teeth." Bella sat down across from him. "Did Jacob tell you that he claimed me as his Chosen?"

Embry nodded. "He also told me about the kiss."

Bella's cheeks reddened. "Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah." Embry set his spoon down in his bowl and took a deep breath. "Bella, are you trying to have sex with Jake to forget about the rape?"

Bella reared back as if she'd been slapped. Tears sprung to her eyes and she looked away, toward the hall that led to the room in which her Jacob was sleeping. "I would NEVER do something like that!" A few tears escaped, but she didn't bother to wipe them away, hugging herself tightly instead. It didn't feel nearly as good as one of Jacob's hugs would have, but she'd take what she could get. "NEVER! Jacob means the world to me, Embry; I could never hurt him that way."

Embry breathed a sigh of relief. "I didn't think so, but I had to ask."

Bella turned back to him. "What on earth gave you such a RIDICULOUS idea, anyway?"

Embry blushed, but answered honestly. "I have a TV in my bedroom, so I usually watch something before I go to sleep. Last night it was a rerun of Oprah that just happened to deal with rape."

Bella couldn't help herself; she burst out laughing. "YOU were watching OPRAH?"

He scowled and took an angry bite of his cereal. With his mouth full, he muttered grumpily, "It's not THAT funny."

Bella was still giggling when she went to bed five minutes later.


	7. Chapter 007

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 007

_**Entry 003 - Tuesday, October 12, 2010**_

_**Jacob must have been even more tired than I thought. I woke up ten minutes ago and he didn't even move when I climbed out of bed to go to the bathroom. His exhaustion isn't just from working on the master bath with Embry yesterday, either. This entire situation has really taken its toll on him.**_

_**In a few minutes I'm going to go cook his favorite breakfast and bring it to him in bed, like he and Embry did for me yesterday. Then I'm going to give him a massage and hopefully put him back to sleep. He deserves a day off from this mess.**_

_**Tomorrow, though, I'm going to have to ruin all of my hard work. I need to go to the nearest free clinic and get tested, and then possibly take the morning after pill if it's not too late. I'm not too sure I could actually do that, though, no matter what people say about an embryo not actually being a baby. It's still the POTENTIAL for a baby, and the thought of murdering even the potential of a child makes me sick.**_

_**But what the hell would I do with a baby? I'm only nineteen, I'm broke, and I don't even know anymore if I'm single or not. Does being Jacob's Chosen make me his girlfriend? I don't know, and I probably don't have the guts to ask. Even if it DOES make me his girlfriend, he's only seventeen himself and not any more ready to be a father than I am to be a mother. Also, what man wants to raise another man's child, especially when that other man is a rapist?**_

_**I'm getting ahead of myself, though. I don't even know if I've conceived or if I'm going to take the morning after pill or not. I guess maybe I should talk about that with Jacob. After everything he's done for me, he deserves to have his say.**_

_**God, if I am pregnant, just please don't make him leave me.**_

"Oh, Jacob," Bella sung, setting the breakfast tray on her side of the bed, "wake up. It's time for breakfast and I made your favorite, blueberry pancakes with sausage AND bacon."

Jacob opened his eyes and looked at her, then at the breakfast tray. A huge smile crossed his face and he sat up, pulling the tray into his lap and starting to eat. "Thanks, Bells, this is great!"

When he'd finished, she took the tray back to the kitchen and put the dirty dishes in the sink to wash later. Then she went back to the bedroom, but Jacob was gone. Realizing that he must have gone to the bathroom to wash up, she sat down on the edge of the bed to wait for him.

Jacob smiled when he saw her. "Thanks again for breakfast, Bells. That was really nice of you." He started rummaging through the dresser drawers for something to wear.

"Wait a minute," Bella said, pulling him away from the dresser and to the bed, "I want to give you a massage. Lay down on your stomach."

He just looked at her, not moving. "You don't have to do that, baby."

Bella rolled her eyes, shoving him hard and catching him off guard. He fell onto his back on the bed. "I KNOW I don't HAVE to. I WANT to. Now, roll over."

This time he did as he was told. "What brought all this on, if you don't mind me asking? The shower last night, breakfast in bed, and now a massage? By the way, I'm sorry about the shower thing. I was REALLY out of it last night or I would have realized that you can shower by yourself now that you're healed. Why DIDN'T you shower by yourself?"

After retrieving the lotion from Jacob's duffel bag, Bella climbed onto the bed and straddled him, sitting on his butt. She poured some lotion into her palm and rubbed her hands together to warm it before putting her hands on the small of his back, just above the waistband of his boxers. "I want to take care of you like you take care of me."

Jacob didn't know what to say to that, so he didn't say anything. He just moaned as her clever fingers found and vanquished every knot in his muscles. By the time she was done, he was asleep again, just like she'd hoped he would be. Smiling to herself, she climbed off of him and went to wash her hands.

She ended up helping Embry study after all. He was having trouble getting through Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, so Bella decided to help him act it out. They split the list of characters down the middle, and then she got two different colored highlighters - pink and yellow - and highlighted both his and Jacob's copies of the play. That way they knew whose lines were whose. Once that was done, they had a BLAST acting out the play.

Jacob resurfaced at about noon, when they were in the middle of committing suicide. He looked at Bella, who was laying on the couch with her eyes closed trying not to giggle at Embry's dramatic acting, and had to grin. Embry saw him and stopped immediately, blushing a little bit. Jacob laughed.

Bella opened her eyes and got up, blushing and laughing at herself and Embry. "Hey, Jacob. Sleep well?"

Jacob pulled her into a tight hug. "I slept GREAT, thanks to you. I'd actually probably STILL be sleeping if my stomach hadn't woke me up." As if to illustrate his point, his stomach growled.

Bella laughed and pulled away, heading for the kitchen. "Why don't you help Embry clean up our mess while I fix us some sandwiches?"

"Sure, sure," Jacob replied easily.

_**Entry 004 - Tuesday, October 12, 2010**_

_**I sent Jacob off with Embry to work on the master bathroom some more because I needed some time to myself to write. All day I've been thinking about the possibility that I'm pregnant. I did some calculating in my head, and it turns out that the night I was raped was the night I was most likely to get pregnant. I'm almost positive now that I have conceived.**_

_**Tonight, after our shower, I'm going to talk to Jacob about it. I know he'll comfort me, and he'll probably say just the right thing to make me feel better, but that's only part of the reason I'm going to bring the subject up. I'm also hoping he'll let something slip that will tell me whether or not he's going to leave me if I do turn out to be pregnant.**_

_**For some reason, I NEED to know what he's going to do before I make any decisions. I think it's because a small part of me is hoping that he'll stay with me even if I am pregnant with my rapist's child. Pathetic, I know, but I can't help the way I feel.**_

_**I just want him to stay with me. PLEASE, God, let him stay with me!**_

Jacob came back to their room an hour earlier than he had the night before and just stood there, feeling more than a little awkward. Bella closed the book she was reading - one of the books on rape that Embry had borrowed from the library - and smiled at him.

"I just, uh …" He scratched the back of his neck nervously, then blurted out, "Are we going shower together again tonight?"

The smile dropped off of Bella's face. "Why? Do you not WANT to?"

"Of course I WANT to!" Jacob rolled his eyes at the ridiculous question. "But we don't NEED to anymore, so I thought maybe you'd want to start taking separate showers."

"Well, I want to, too. I like the way you wash me, and I like washing you. It just feels GOOD, you know?" Bella blushed at her own words, but she was just being honest. Showering with Jacob DID feel good - DAMN good. It felt like love.

Jacob grinned happily at her. "Yeah, I know EXACTLY what you're talking about. Shall we?" She took his arm and he led her to the bathroom.

They stripped facing each other, admiring each other's bodies. Bella still had a faint blush on her face, but she wasn't at all uncomfortable. Just the opposite, in fact. Even when Jacob began to harden under her intense gaze, she remained totally at ease. She knew that her Jacob would never even DREAM of hurting her.

They got in the shower and this time Bella picked up the shampoo first. She lathered Jacob's hair good, massaging his head and making him moan as she did. Then she told him to rinse and began to wash him slowly and with infinite care. She washed every part of him, even his erection, which made them both blush. Then he returned the favor, being as tender with Bella as she had been with him.

Once they were dry and dressed, they took turns brushing their teeth before going back to their bedroom. She waited until they were settled in bed in their favorite position - Jacob spooning Bella - to bring up the topic that had been haunting her all day.

"Jacob," she said bluntly, "I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant."

She felt him tense behind her. "It's only been four days, Bells. You can't POSSIBLY know. So why say something like that?"

"I did some calculating. The night I was raped was my most fertile day of the month." Bella took a deep, shaky breath. In a small voice, she asked, "Are you going to leave me now?"

Jacob sat up and turned on the bedside light, then picked Bella up and sat her in his lap. He looked her directly in the eye. "I will NEVER leave you. I will ALWAYS be here. You could have ten babies for all I care - I still wouldn't leave your side."

Bella believed him. Throwing her arms around his neck, she let out a HUGE sigh of relief. "THANK YOU! You have no idea how much it means to me that you would stay with me even though I'm pregnant with my rapist's kid."

Jacob hugged her back, but he was frowning. "Baby, you might not even BE pregnant. You're no doctor - you can't know for SURE. So let's not get ahead of ourselves, okay?"

"Okay," Bella agreed. She knew he was right. "So, hey, I was wondering …" She trailed off, blushing.

"Yeah?" He pulled away to look at her, raising an eyebrow when he saw her blush. "What were you wondering?"

"I was wondering when you're going to kiss me again." Bella bit her lip nervously.

Jacob's eyes darkened and he eyed her lips hungrily, but then he shook his head. "I don't think that's the best idea, baby."

"Why not?" Bella demanded. "You didn't have a problem kissing me the night before last!"

"The night before last, you still looked like somebody's punching bag!" Jacob blurted. His cheeks were red and he wouldn't meet her gaze.

Bella stared at him. "What does THAT have to do with anything?"

"When you looked like that, abused, I couldn't …" He trailed off. There was an awkward pause and then he decided to just be blunt. "When you looked like you did Sunday night, I couldn't get hard. But now that you're all healed up … well, I wouldn't be able to help it. I just don't want to put you in that position."

Bella understood where he was coming from, but it changed nothing. "I still want you to kiss me. I don't care if you get hard."

"Not tonight, Bella," Jacob said firmly. He was sure he was doing the right thing. Despite what had happened Sunday night, he knew she couldn't possibly be ready for that kind of intimacy yet.

Something closed down in Bella's eyes and she got up out of his lap, grabbing her pillow. "I'm going to sleep on the couch. DON'T follow me."

Jacob sat in the same spot for a long time before finally laying down. He wasn't so sure he knew what the right thing for Bella was anymore.


	8. Chapter 008

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 008

_**Entry 005 - Wednesday, October 13, 2010**_

_**I haven't slept at all, and it's all Jacob's fault. Who does he think he is, holding his kisses hostage just because he thinks it's too soon for me? If it were too soon for me, I wouldn't have asked him to kiss me in the first place!**_

_**I know he means well, I do. But this relationship just ISN'T going to work if he can't trust that I know my own mind. Are we even IN a relationship? I thought so. He claimed me as his Chosen and I claimed him back, and we kissed, but since then he's acted like it never happened. Until I brought it up last night, that is.**_

_**Oh, and what a bullshit excuse he gave me when he refused to kiss me! I'd already seen him hard in the shower; I'd even touched his erection! To wash it, that is. The only reason he didn't want to kiss me is because of the rape!**_

_**Maybe he really IS disgusted by me. Sure, my naked body still turns him on, but he refuses to touch it in anything but a friendly way. Yeah, he claimed me as his Chosen, but he himself told me he would NEVER try to Mate with me. He said he just didn't want me to be uncomfortable, but he could have been lying.**_

_**Maybe I should just leave. Go somewhere far away where nobody knows anything about me and try to rebuild my life.**_

Jacob, appearing out of nowhere, snatched the pen out of her hand. "There are so many things wrong with what you just wrote that I don't even know where to begin!"

Bella gaped at him. "Who the HELL do you think you are? What I write is nobody's business but mine!" She snatched the pen back and closed the notebook, setting both on the coffee table before standing to face him. "What the FUCK is your problem?"

"MY problem? I don't HAVE a problem! YOU'RE the one that's planning to leave ME!" Though his tone was angry, his eyes were filled with hurt. "Well, I won't LET you!"

"You won't LET me?" Bella crossed her arms and arched an eyebrow at him. "News flash - I don't NEED or WANT your permission! I'm leaving and there isn't a DAMN thing you can do about it!" She spun around, intending to go to their room and get the few things that belonged to her so she could go … wherever.

His hand on her shoulder stopped her, and then Jacob's chest was pressed against her back, his arms wrapped around her. "I don't want to fight anymore." He sounded tired and sad. "PLEASE don't leave me, Bella. I'll do anything you want; just please stay with me."

Bella remained tense in his embrace. "Why should I? I'm just in your way, anyway."

Jacob wished she could feel what was in his heart. Then maybe she would understand how completely his world revolved around her. He didn't know how to put that kind of emotion into words. He squeezed her tighter, scrambling for the perfect words that would make her stay. Unbeknownst to him, a tear escaped his eye and landed on Bella's shoulder.

She softened immediately. "I'll stay on one condition, Jacob."

"ANYTHING!" he said fervently.

"Trust me," she said simply. "I just need you to trust me."

Jacob, who had seen everything she'd written before he lost it and took her pen away, knew exactly what she meant. "I DO trust you. I DO, baby. It's me I don't trust. You're so beautiful and I love you SO much. I'm afraid I'll get carried away if I kiss you again."

Bella finally turned in his arms, tilting her head back to look at him. "If you do, I'll just tell you to stop. I want you to kiss me again SO badly, Jacob. Please?"

He hesitated. Should he? He hadn't been lying when he said that he trusted Bella more than he did himself. Now he had to trust that she would tell him to stop if he went too far. Taking a deep breath, he lowered his lips to hers.

At first it was chaste, just a gentle touch of lips, but then Bella parted her lips and licked his lower lip. With a quiet growl, he let his own tongue out to play, and the kiss became passionate quickly. Bella melted against him, feeling his half hard cock against her stomach and not giving a damn.

A throat cleared, breaking them apart. Embry stood a few feet away, looking amused. "I just came to tell you that I made lunch. It's in the kitchen. I already ate, so I'm going to get back to work on the bathroom." He walked away before either one of them had a chance to say anything.

Bella turned back to Jacob, bright red but smiling widely. "See? We kissed and we're fine, so just relax, okay?"

"Sure, sure," Jacob said huskily.

That night, when they got in the shower, Bella asked for another kiss. "Trust me," she whispered, and pulled his head down. She pressed her wet, naked body against him and moaned, seriously trying Jacob's control.

He pulled his mouth from hers, but couldn't bring himself to separate their bodies. He was hard, but Bella didn't seem to mind. "'Bella, I want to -" He cut himself off abruptly, horrified with himself, tensing and stepping back.

She followed him. "What? What do you want, Jacob? Tell me, PLEASE."

Trapped between the wall and Bella's body, he swallowed hard and closed his eyes. "I want to make you come."

Bella's eyes darkened with desire. "You want to make me feel good, Jacob?"

Helplessly, he replied, "YES."

Keeping her gaze locked with his, she took his hand and pulled it to her center. She bit her lip, rubbing herself against him. "PLEASE."

Jacob just stood there for a minute, completely frozen. GOD, she was wet for him. But could he do this? He'd promised to trust her. Besides, it wasn't like he wanted her to return the favor or anything. He just wanted to make her feel good. "Okay," he said hoarsely.

Two fingers slid inside her easily while his thumb moved to rub small, tight circles around her clit. Unable to help himself, he kissed her again hungrily. She felt so fucking GOOD. "I love you, baby," he whispered against her lips as he began to pump his fingers in and out of her, keeping his thumb on her clit.

Bella gasped into his mouth and ground herself down on his hand. FUCK, it wasn't going to take long. She yanked her mouth from his, throwing her head back in pleasure. "Oh, oh, JACOB!" She came hard with a shout of his name and would have fallen if he hadn't caught her.

"I love you, too," she said when she'd caught her breath. She reached for his erection, but he grabbed her hand. Tilting her head back, she searched his eyes. After a moment, she backed off. "Come on, let's get clean."

That night, when they were in bed in their favorite position, Bella spoke. "I understand that you're not ready for me to touch you. But I'd like to watch you touch yourself, sometime."

His cock hardened instantly, pressing against the small of her back. Jacob growled and put his hand on her hip, encouraging her to turn and face him. She did, and this time it was HIS turn to search HER eyes. Finally, he nodded.

She had wanted them to sleep naked together, so there was nothing to remove. Jacob kicked the sheet off of them and slid his hand to his hard dick, staring blatantly at her bare body. He started to stroke himself, reaching down with his other hand to fondle his balls. "GOD, you're fucking beautiful, Bells."

To his surprise and delight, she started touching herself as well. "Look who's talking, Mr. Perfect," she replied breathily. "FUCK, I just want to lick you ALL over."

He growled, his hand moving fast as he watched her slide her fingers inside of herself. He was wound up too tight to last much longer. "I'm going to come, Bells. Watch me come for you, baby." That said, he squeezed his balls and stroked up HARD, spilling all over himself.

Before he could stop her, Bella moved closer and bent her head to lick him clean. His dick twitched and he shivered, touching her head but making no move to pull her away. "What are you doing?" he asked lazily.

She didn't answer until she'd licked up every drop of his come. Then she looked up. "Savoring you."

He pulled her up, turning on his side and pressing his forehead to hers. "I can't believe I just DID that."

"Get used to it," Bella told him. "If I get my way, you'll be doing it every night. Maybe one of these nights you'll even let me do it for you."

"You're really okay?" Jacob asked seriously. "You're not just pretending?"

Bella looked at him like he was stupid before grabbing his hand and pulling it to her center. "Here, feel for yourself just how much I liked watching you come."

She was drenched. He dipped his fingers inside her and then brought them to his mouth, sucking her juices from them. "Mm. You taste like cream."

Bella ached. She wasn't sure why she was suddenly craving Jacob's touch so much, but she sure as hell LOVED the way his hands felt on her. She bet his mouth would feel even better. "Jacob?"

"Hmm?" Jacob stared at her with black eyes, licking his lips. "What is it, baby?"

She felt her face turn red, but she wasn't going to let a little embarrassment get in the way of what she so desperately NEEDED. "Will you make me come again? With your mouth, this time? I want to feel your tongue on me. PLEASE?"

It was the please that did it. With a low growl, Jacob flipped her onto her back, burying his face in her cunt. He licked and sucked at her until she screamed, yanking his hair, and squirted into his mouth. He groaned at the taste and kept lapping at her until she pulled him up for a kiss.

"GOD, I love you," she said breathlessly when they pulled apart. "We are DEFINITELY making this a nightly ritual."

Jacob's dick twitched again. "Whatever you say, Bells."

"You liked it too, didn't you?" Bella asked, suddenly concerned. "I didn't pressure you too much?"

"Oh, baby." He chuckled. "I loved every second."

"GOOD." Bella cuddled against him. There was a moment of silence, and then she asked, "Do you think Embry heard us?"

"YES!" Embry shouted from his room.

Bella flushed a deep shade of red, but laughed anyway. "Sorry, Embry." She didn't bother to raise her voice.

Jacob just rolled his eyes. "Don't mind Embry. He's just jealous."

"Well, he'll have to find his own girl," Bella said decisively. "I belong to YOU."

Long after she was asleep, Jacob thought about those words and what they meant. Bella Swan belonged to him. She was his to hug and kiss and love. She was his to protect, and if necessary, avenge. Unfortunately, it was necessary.

Tyler Crowley and his friends were going DOWN. Jacob would take them out of life's equation entirely, but he'd make sure that they hurt BAD before he did. If Bella wanted, he'd even let her watch. It would be at least a little bit of closure for her, watching them die.

Jacob stroked his sleeping Chosen's hair and smiled at the ceiling. It wasn't a nice smile. No, this smile was deadly.

Soon.


	9. Chapter 009

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 009

_**Entry 006 - Thursday, October 14, 2010**_

_**I changed my mind; I'm not leaving. Jacob and I talked, and he promised that he'd trust me from now on, so I agreed to stay. So far he's kept up his end of the bargain, and things couldn't be better.**_

_**Last night was AMAZING. I didn't intend to take it so far, but when Jacob told me that he wanted to make me come, it made me SO wet. I took his hand and put it on me, and for a moment he froze, but then he kissed me again. His fingers started to move, two pumping in and out of me while he rubbed my clit with his thumb. It wasn't long before I was coming HARD, my shout of his name echoing in the shower.**_

_**I tried to return the favor, but he made it clear that he's not ready for me to touch him yet. I guess I can understand that. He'd probably have felt horribly guilty if he'd allowed me to get him off. I AM a rape victim, after all. (Excuse the bitterness. I hate being a victim of any kind, let alone a victim of RAPE.)**_

_**Once we were in bed, I proposed a compromise. I wanted so badly to see him come, so I asked him to touch himself for me. Best idea I EVER had! He was beautiful, so sexy, that I couldn't help but play with myself while I watched. He liked that a LOT. He lasted about as long as I had in the shower before he shot his seed.**_

_**I couldn't help myself. I HAD to taste him. So while he was recovering, I leaned down and used my tongue to lick him clean. His semen tasted like bananas, which just happen to be my favorite fruit. I was disappointed when it was all gone.**_

_**Then he asked me if I was okay, and I decided to show him just how OKAY I was. Once again, I pulled his hand to my center, letting him feel my desire. He did the HOTTEST thing - he dipped his fingers inside me and then put those same fingers in his mouth, sucking my juices off of them. He said I tasted like cream.**_

_**Though I was embarrassed, I somehow found the guts to ask him to put his mouth on me and make me come that way. He did, driving me to a screaming orgasm that put the one I'd had in the shower to shame. Like I said, last night was AMAZING.**_

_**I know it shouldn't be so easy for me to do sexual stuff so soon after the rape, but I have a theory. I think that whatever healed my body the other night also healed my soul. Not completely, of course - just enough to make it possible for Jacob and I to eventually Mate.**_

_**I think that when he claimed me as his Chosen, the magic of the claim saw that I might NEVER be able to complete the bond. So the magic healed me enough to make sure that I WOULD be able to one day. It makes sense, at least to me. I mean, how could I be Jacob's Chosen if we were never going to Mate? I couldn't. It would defeat the purpose of the claiming entirely.**_

_**I haven't shared my theory with Jacob and Embry yet, but I plan on telling them all about it tonight over dinner. Right now I'm just enjoying this time to myself while the boys work on the master bath. Embry thinks with Jacob's help that they'll probably finish it today. Then Embry is going to turn his entire focus to his studies, and Jacob is going to start hunting Tyler and his thugs.**_

_**I'm not sure how I feel about that. On one hand, I want them dead just as badly as my Jacob does. On the other hand, I have no idea how we can possibly accomplish that goal without getting arrested for murder. Jacob keeps telling me not to worry about it, but he doesn't how we're going to pull it off either. Maybe we should just leave it alone.**_

_**But I want them DEAD.**_

Bella sighed and closed the notebook, setting it and the pen on the bedside table. Writing about murder had reminded her - she needed to call Charlie. Getting to her feet, she went to use the phone in the kitchen.

He picked up on the third ring. "Hello?"

"Hey, Dad, it's me," Bella said cheerfully, using her memories of the night before to lift her mood. "How are you?"

"Bella!" He sounded happy to hear from her. "I'm fine, honey, how are you? You sound MUCH better than you did the other day."

Bella smiled. "I FEEL better."

"I'm glad, Bella. Does this mean you're coming home now?" Charlie asked hopefully.

"Not just yet. I probably won't be back for at least another week." A week and three days, to be exact. She wasn't leaving until Jacob and Embry did.

Charlie sighed. "Okay, kid. Do what you need to do."

"Thanks, Dad." Not for the first time, she was grateful for her father's laid back nature. "I love you."

"Love you, too," he replied, a touch uncomfortably. "Bye."

"Bye." Bella hung up the phone and started looking for cleaning supplies. It was the least she could do, and besides, she was bored.

That night, while they were eating, Bella brought up her theory. "I think that more than my body was healed Sunday night."

Embry nodded. "I had that thought myself. It's like your spirit was healed as well. Not completely, but a little bit."

"Exactly." Bella smiled at him. "Anyway, I have a theory about the whole thing." She quickly explained how she thought the magic from Jacob's claim had healed her so that she might someday be able to complete the bond.

Jacob was skeptical. "It's not supposed to work like that, though. Claiming magic is BINDING, not HEALING. In the past, other Werewolves' Chosens have been injured, and no magic healed THEM. Why should things suddenly change for us? It doesn't make sense."

Embry snorted. "Since when does ANY of this supernatural shit make sense? I say we should just be happy it happened and stop trying to analyze it."

He had a point, so Bella and Jacob both agreed to let it be and finished their meals. Embry offered to clean up the kitchen, smirking knowingly at them. Jacob threw a dish rag at his head and led Bella down the hall to the bathroom.

They watched each other strip, heat in their gazes, and then climbed into the shower. Once they were in, Bella pressed as close to Jacob as she could get, tilting her face up for a kiss that he gladly gave her. He put one hand on the small of her back to hold her against him and tangled the other in her hair, licking into her mouth. Bella moaned and kissed him back just as passionately as he was kissing her, snaking her arms around his neck.

Jacob's mouth broke away from hers and trailed across her jaw line to her ear. "Tell me what you want, Bells," he whispered hotly. "I want to make you SCREAM."

A dozen images flashed past her mind's eye in a matter of seconds and Bella sucked in a sharp breath. She wasn't ready for ANY of that yet, no matter how much she'd healed. She'd really enjoyed having his mouth on her the night before, though. "I want you to eat me out again," she spoke clearly, but she was blushing.

"Yes," he growled. Then he dropped to his knees in front of her. "Spread your legs."

Her heart pounding, Bella did as she was told. She kept her eyes on the top of his head, feeling her juices slide down her inner thighs.

Jacob took a deep breath, the scent of her arousal making his head swim. Holding her hips in his hands to steady both himself and her, he leaned forward and kissed the inside of her left thigh. Tasting her juices, he moaned and slid his left hand down to her pussy, easily slipping two fingers inside of her. Slowly pumping his fingers in and out of her, he licked both of her thighs clean before moving his mouth to her clit, which he immediately began teasing with his tongue.

Above him, Bella whimpered and grabbed the shower bar, squeezing it so tightly that her knuckles turned white. The faster his fingers moved, the faster Jacob flicked her clit with his tongue and the more Bella whimpered.

The sound was driving Jacob crazy. His cock was hard enough to cut diamonds, but he resisted the urge to touch it. In the back of his mind, he was hoping that Bella would want to watch him again.

Bella began to gasp between whimpers, and Jacob's fingers and tongue moved at furious pace. One, two, three more flicks and she was coming, screaming her ecstasy to the world in the form of his name. "JACOB!" Slowly, she sunk to a sitting position on the floor of the shower. "WOW."

Jacob smiled smugly before sucking his fingers clean of her come. He groaned at the taste. "GOD, if I could bottle your taste I'd make BILLIONS!"

Bella laughed breathlessly, but her eyes were on Jacob's erection. He was still kneeling next to her, so it was hard NOT to look. "Will you let me touch you tonight?" she asked, her expression hopeful.

Jacob stopped smiling and stood, helping her up. "Lets finish our shower while I think about it."

Bella nodded, excited that she might be allowed to make him come. They washed each other quickly but efficiently, then climbed out and dried each other off. They brushed their teeth and Bella put on Jacob's t-shirt long enough to get down the hall to their room. Jacob wore his boxers.

It wasn't until they were undressed and in there favorite position in bed again that Jacob finally spoke. "It's not that I don't want you to touch me; I DO. I just keep thinking about all of the stuff I read about rape. You shouldn't WANT to touch me."

"I thought we cleared this up during dinner." Bella sighed and turned to face him. "Whatever healed my body Sunday night also healed my spirit, like Embry said. No, I'm not ready for everything yet, but I am ready for some things. Touching you is one of those things."

"Okay," Jacob agreed after a short moment of silence. He kicked the sheet off of them and laid flat on his back with his hands folded behind his head. "Have your way with me."

Bella didn't waste any time. She gripped his big dick with both of her tiny hands and, without warning, kissed the head. Her lips were sticky when she pulled away, so she licked them. Then she moaned and went back for more, sucking the head of his erection as she worked him with her hands.

Jacob couldn't believe she'd put her mouth on him. Despite what had happened the night before, he hadn't expected her to be so forward. Well, he HAD told her to have her way with him, hadn't he? He decided to just relax and enjoy it.

Just then, Bella stabbed her tongue into his slit, moaning. He came in a rush and she swallowed it all, moaning the entire time. He just tasted so damn GOOD! Crawling back up his body, she kissed him HARD.

"I love you SO much," she told him once they'd pulled apart.

He smiled one of his sunshine smiles. "I love you, too, baby."


	10. Chapter 010

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 010

_**Entry 007 - Friday, October 15, 2010**_

_**Jacob let me touch him last night. It was the most amazing thing - I felt so POWERFUL. I can't wait to do it again tonight. Giving him that kind of pleasure makes me feel so close to him, like we're one person in two bodies. I want to be even closer, but the thought of full on sex still freaks me out. That's okay. I know now that it will happen someday.**_

_**I can't help thinking of Edward. How could I have ever believed I was truly in love with him? I cared for him deeply, in fact I still do, but now that I've given in to my feelings for Jacob I realize that they are so much MORE than anything I ever experienced with Edward. I hope he's well, but I don't want him back.**_

_**In fact, mostly when I think of Edward these days I just get PISSED. Who was he to say those things to me in the woods? To make me feel so worthless? It occurs to me now that he raped my soul months before Tyler and his thugs ever raped my body. If it weren't for Jacob I probably would have killed myself by now, that's how horrible he made me feel about myself. I know I thought about it enough times.**_

_**I would never do something that horribly selfish and cowardly now. I can hardly believe that I ever even considered it at all. Not just because of Jacob, but because of everyone who cares about me. Charlie, Renee, the rest of the Pack, and even my friends from school like Angela and Jessica. God, Jessica. I owe her a long overdue apology for scaring her the way I did that night we went to Port Angeles, when she was trying so hard to cheer me up. In fact, I owe her more than that - I owe her the TRUTH, at least as much of it as I can give her without endangering her.**_

_**I owe Charlie the truth, too, I think - the whole truth. Even the parts that will hurt him, like my thoughts of suicide after Edward left me and the gang rape I so recently endured. He's my father and, while he's not perfect, he's always loved me and tried his best to do the right things for me. He deserves my honesty, at the very least, and I think it's time I started facing my fears instead of hiding from them.**_

_**Yes. Yes, this is the right choice, I can feel it in my bones. I'm going to talk to Jacob about it - some of the secrets I plan to share with Charlie are HIS, after all - but I just know he'll agree. Maybe he'll even have some idea of how to go about it without giving my poor father a heart attack. I'm going to go talk to he and Embry about it now.**_

Bella found the boys in the kitchen, eating junk food and discussing which room they should work on next, since the master bathroom had been finished the day before. "Jacob, Embry, can I talk to you guys about something?"

Jacob, still chewing, nodded as Embry smiled and replied, "Pull up a seat, Juliet."

Bella smiled and rolled her eyes as she sat down in the chair between them. "Thanks, Romeo. Anyway, the thing is, I've come to the conclusion that I need to tell my Dad everything."

Jacob swallowed his mouthful loudly, looking shocked. He knew her well enough to know that when she said everything, she meant EVERYTHING. "Just the other day you wouldn't even CONSIDER telling him about the - about what happened to you the other night, and now all of a sudden you want to spill all of the supernatural beans? Why the sudden change of heart, Bells?"

Bella opened her mouth to explain, but Embry cut her off. "I think it's an EXCELLENT idea! Charlie IS the Chief of Police, Jake; he'd make a really powerful ally, and even if that wasn't the case, Bella is his daughter and he DESERVES to know. Especially since the two of you are pretty much engaged."

Jacob nodded his agreement but didn't reply, keeping his eyes on Bella. He still wanted to know what her reasons were, because he didn't want her to do anything she might regret later, even though he DID think it was a good idea and had actually been entertaining the thought of bringing it up with her just last night as he was drifting off to sleep.

Bella took a deep breath. "When I was six and Renee asked Charlie for a divorce, he never fought her for custody. For a long time - hell, until just last year - I hated him for that. I thought it meant that he didn't care about me, that all I was to him was a reminder of his failed marriage, but now I know better. He didn't do it because he DIDN'T care, he did it because he DID. I think he thought that since I was a girl, it would be easier for me to be raised by my Mom. In a lot of ways he was right about that.

"In other ways he was wrong, of course, but how could he have known just how irresponsible Renee would sometimes choose to be? He couldn't have, because when she was still with him, she wasn't so … well, I guess the word I'm looking for is flaky. Don't get me wrong, I love Renee, but for the most part after the divorce, I spent more time raising her than she did raising me. I resented Dad for that more than I did her because I thought that he'd KNOWN it would be that way.

"When I came here to live with him, though, I started to notice that every time I did something super responsible - you know, the kinds of things a normal teenager wouldn't think to do without being asked, like cleaning the entire house at least once every week - he'd get this look of regret in his eyes. One Wednesday he had off from work, I left school during lunch to fix him something healthy to eat, and when I got to the house he was in the living room watching a tape of my fourth birthday and cursing at the television every time Renee came on the screen, saying things like how he'd trusted her and how I'd deserved to have a happy, free childhood. I left before he noticed me and he never even knew I was there, but after that I couldn't be angry at him anymore. I still didn't really trust him, though.

"But then Edward left me in the woods that night and I got lost, and when I finally gave up and just curled up on the ground I remember thinking that I was going to die there, because Charlie didn't know me well enough to guess that I'd gotten lost. I thought he would probably assume I'd run off with Edward when he wasn't able to reach the Cullens, and he'd never even know that I was dead until some hiker stumbled over my body one day." Bella paused and took a deep breath, shaking her head in wonder. "But I was wrong. He told me later that after he went to the Cullens' and found their house abandoned, he knew I must have gotten lost in the woods because I would never have left without at least telling him goodbye. So maybe he didn't know EVERYTHING about me, but he knew that. He knew that, and so he set up a search party and, well, you guys know the rest."

"So why not tell him then? Why now, nearly six months later?" Embry asked curiously. "I mean, that's when you started to trust him, right?"

Bella nodded. "Yes, that's when I started to trust him. But for the next two months, I was so wrapped up in my own pain that telling him the truth about Vampires never even occurred to me, and even if it had, I didn't have any proof. Then, when I started spending time with Jacob and finally started to get it together again, there was still no proof and I didn't think there was even a point, since the Cullens were never coming back anyway. I never actually truly considered it until I found out about the Pack, but even then I couldn't tell him, because Sam was Alpha and he would never have allowed it. But now Jacob is Alpha and I don't want to keep secrets from him anymore, guys. He deserves better from his own daughter."

Jacob smiled, because telling Charlie everything was obviously not just some whim. Bella had obviously given the idea a hell of a lot of thought, and he could see in her eyes and hear in her voice that she'd made peace with her decision. There would be no regrets - well, unless Charlie completely freaked, which Jacob thought was highly unlikely. Bella and her father were a lot alike; once he had concrete proof of the supernatural, he would probably take things in stride just as she had. Of course, it would probably be wise to have a couple of bottles of whiskey on hand for the more painful parts of the story, but he or Embry could get that easily enough. Since they both looked like grown men, it was unlikely that they'd be carded at any liquor store besides the one on the reservation.

A long moment passed in which Jacob just smiled at Bella, not saying a word. Finally she got impatient and reached over to smack him hard on the shoulder. "Well?" She shook her sore hand out and turned to stick her tongue out at Embry when he laughed at her, then turned back to her silent Chosen. "What do you think, Jacob? It's your decision - you ARE Alpha now, remember?"

"I remember. I think it's a great idea, Bells - in fact the idea actually occurred to me last night, but I wasn't going to bring it up because before today you just seemed so determined to keep Charlie in the dark. But I think this is the right choice, and I know my Dad would be really relieved if he didn't have to keep secrets from your Dad anymore. It hurts him, I think, having to lie so often to his best friend. So I guess the question is, when and where do we tell him?"

Embry cheered loudly and Bella let out a relieved breath, smiling at them both in turn. "I think we should do it today, here - if that's okay, Embry?" When her friend nodded, she smiled and turned back to Jacob. "I think you should call Billy and tell him to bring Charlie here because I have something to tell both of them. Tell him I got back into town late last night and stopped here to talk to you guys about the same thing I want to talk to them about, and then I crashed. Tell them we need complete privacy for this conversation but don't tell him why, and then when they get here we'll tell them the truth. ALL of it."

"Sounds like a plan to me." That said, Jacob pushed his chair back and went to get the phone, which he dialed on his way back to his seat. "Dad? It's me. Listen, I need you to do me a favor …"


	11. Chapter 011

Title: Fallen

Author: Lazalot_Anreads

Beta: None

Characters/Pairings: Bella/Jacob

Rating: NC-17

Challenge: None

Summary: Bella is just starting to heal when she is raped, beaten, and left for dead on the side of the road near the reservation. Jacob finds her.

Notes: Rape, New Moon AU

Chapter 011

_**Entry 008 - Friday, October 15, 2010**_

_**Jacob and Embry both think that telling Charlie the truth is a great idea, so Jacob called Billy with one last lie to get him to bring my Dad up here and now we're just waiting. Jacob told Billy to bring Charlie straight to the backyard, so here we all are, my Chosen sitting back against the trunk of the biggest oak tree and me sitting back against his chest, with Embry in his Wolf skin laying quietly beside us. We thought it would be best to show Charlie our proof before we actually told him anything, because otherwise he might not even listen.**_

_**Jacob said he thought his Dad sounded sort of suspicious on the phone, but that with nobody knowing that Sam is no longer Alpha of the Pack, Billy will likely be almost as surprised as Charlie by our little show and tell. I'm nervous about both of their reactions, but since Jacob and Embry seem to think everything will turn out okay, I'm not having any panic attacks or anything.**_

_**I'm afraid that they'll be mad at me, Billy for outing him as a liar to his closest friend, and Charlie for not telling him the truth sooner. I'm worried that they'll be disgusted with me, too, for all sorts of reasons - dating a Vampire and being raped just two of them. My emotions are bouncing around so much that I feel more than a little sick, but I'm not questioning my choice because I know it's the right one.**_

"They're here," Jacob said softly, taking the notebook and pen from Bella and setting them aside just as the sound of an engine reached her own less sensitive ears. Embry lifted his head off his front paws and tossed her a – literally – wolfish grin, his dark eyes sparkling with mischief. Bella giggled nervously, and then they all faced the side of the house as Billy and Charlie turned the corner and saw them.

Billy's jaw dropped and he rolled to a stop, obviously stunned. Charlie took one look at Embry and reached slowly for his gun, saying through gritted teeth, "Don't move, kids."

"Wait!" Billy shouted, coming to his senses and slapping the gun out of Charlie's hands before the other man could even get the safety off. It fell harmlessly to the ground several feet away and Charlie looked at Billy like he was crazy. "Bella and Jacob aren't in danger, Charlie, I swear!"

"Dad," Bella said, more calmly than she felt, "look at the Wolf. Look VERY closely." Charlie gave her the same look he'd given Billy, but did as she asked anyway and turned his attention to Embry. Bella kept her eyes on her Dad's face, not at all interested in seeing her friend in the buff.

A moment later Charlie gasped and stumbled back, tripping over something and landing hard on his ass. Under other circumstances, one or all of them might have laughed, but the situation was far too serious for that now. Billy wheeled himself over to Charlie and held out a hand to help the Chief of Police to his feet, which he took after only a slight hesitation. "What IS this?" he demanded of Embry, then held up a hand. "Wait. Don't answer that until you put on some pants. My daughter is sitting right THERE!"

Embry flushed, having forgotten his nudity in favor of watching Bella's father's reaction to his transformation, and quickly untied his sweatpants from his leg and pulled them on. "Sorry, Bella, you can look now. Sir, my name is Embry Call, and I'm a Werewolf. I'm sorry for startling you, but we all thought it would be best to give you some proof of the supernatural BEFORE Bella tells you her story, so that you wouldn't think she was crazy or lying or anything like that."

"A Werewolf?" Charlie stared at him for a long moment before heaving a sigh and turning his gaze to Bella, who sat tense and trembling as she waited for … something. "Christ, Bella, I knew you had secrets, but this is just – this is … Shit, I need a drink."

Jacob gently nudged Bella forward so that he could get out from behind her, grabbing the bottle of whiskey resting on the ground next to him and handing it to the Police Chief. "We thought you might say that, so Embry ran out and picked this up earlier."

Charlie didn't bother to ask how they'd managed that – it was obvious to anyone who looked at the boys that they could easily pass for adults. Instead he just twisted the cap off and took a very long swig. Then he turned to Billy. "So you knew about this? Werewolves, I mean?" Then, without waiting for a reply, he looked back at Jacob. "You too?"

"Yes, sir," Jacob replied with a nod. Then he glanced at his father, who was still looking very confused. "In fact, just recently I challenged Sam for the title of Alpha, and I won."

Billy's eyes widened, the light dawning. "But WHY? You told me that you NEVER wanted to claim that title! So why now?"

Jacob looked at Bella, who got to her feet and picked up her journal and pen. "I think we should probably go inside for this. It's a very long story and it will be dark soon." That said, she walked into the house, trusting all of them to follow her.

They made themselves comfortable in the living room and Bella took a deep breath. "Please just listen until I finish, okay? This is really hard." Once they all nodded, Jacob and Embry smiling at her to show their support, she continued. "It all started on my first day of school, right after I returned to Forks. I saw Edward Cullen for the first time, and even though he looked at me like I was something gross on the bottom of his shoe, I was fascinated. I wanted to know everything about him. Looking back now, I can see that I mistook my first crush for real, true love, but back then I really believed that he was it for me.

"Then, when T-Tyler's car almost hit me, and Edward did impossible things to save my life, I took it as proof that he felt the same way about me as I did about him. I also became even more curious than I had been before." Bella paused and rubbed a hand over his eyes. "Long story short, Dad, I found out that he and his family are all Vampires. Not the movie kind – I'll explain how Vampires work to you later, and I'm sure Billy will be happy to explain Werewolves. In fact, I'm going to skip over quite a few things tonight because I'm getting sort of tired, but I promise I'll fill in the blanks tomorrow morning if you want to stay. They can stay, right Embry?"

"Of course," Embry said with a sympathetic smile. "There are plenty of rooms and plenty of sheets. Go on, Bella."

"Right." Bella bit her lip, reached for Jacob's hand to give her a little extra courage, and went on. "Anyway, when Alice threw that party for my eighteenth birthday, I got a paper cut opening a gift and it bled. Jasper – and it wasn't his fault, he's new to the Cullens' lifestyle of feeding only on animal blood and doesn't have quite the same amount of control – tried to get at me. Edward threw me behind him a little too forcefully, trying to keep Jasper away, and I fell into a glass coffee table and got my arm all sliced up. Carlisle sent the others away and took care of it, but then the next day Edward took me into the woods and – God, he made me HATE myself. He basically told me that I was just a toy to him, that he never REALLY wanted me, and that I was worthless. I believed him, and you all know how things went after that."

"Bella." Charlie's eyes were dark with impotent rage, and he took another long drink before he continued. "You know that I've never liked Edward – and I ESPECIALLY hate his guts now – but that story makes me think that he left to protect you. He still shouldn't have said those things to you, but you have to realize that the things he said were probably lies."

"It doesn't matter anymore if they were or they weren't." Bella shrugged and smiled wryly, squeezing Jacob's hand. "Jacob made me realize for MYSELF that I'm worth plenty. Unfortunately, though, that belief was recently tested again and some days I find it REALLY hard to hold onto. Thank God for Jacob and Embry – if it weren't for them, I don't know what I might have done."

Letting go of Jacob, Bella leaned forward and looked deep into her father's eyes. "You're not going to like this next part at all, Daddy, but you need to keep your head. Okay?"

Charlie took another long drink and nodded, reaching forward with his free hand to clasp one of Bella's. "I promise to try my absolute best, sweetheart."

Bella closed her eyes, unable to bear seeing his reaction when she told him what had been done to her. "I lied to you. I didn't intend to leave, and there was never any note. I've been here with Jake and Embry the entire time. You see, on Friday night I was walking to the Reservation because I had something I needed to tell Jacob, but when I was a little over halfway there I remembered that he'd come up here with Embry. So I turned around to go home –" She choked and shook her head. "God, I just CAN'T. Jacob, you know the story. Will you tell it? PLEASE?"

"Of course, Bells." Jacob ran his fingers gently over Bella's hair and looked his Chosen's father right in the eye. "I'm not going to name any names, because I know you'd want to arrest them, and I have every intention of torturing and killing the bastards. Jail is too good for them. I don't care if you arrest me for murder after the fact, but please just understand that I can't allow those fucking MONSTERS to live."

"Son –" Billy started, not believing his ears, but fell silent when Charlie waved a hand at him.

"Tell me," Charlie told Jacob, tightening his hand around Bella's. "If YOU are planning murders, then I know it's bad. I need to know. Tell me."

"On Friday night Embry and I were on our way back home when we spotted Bella curled up on the side of the road – Werewolf sight, and thank God for it. I knew from her scent what had happened but I couldn't make myself acknowledge it until later. She was beat up pretty bad, so I told her that I would take her to the hospital, but she refused. I might have taken her anyway, but my instincts were telling me that a hospital would be the worst thing for her and since they'd never let me down before, I followed them. Embry and I brought her back here and took care of her. She hadn't just been beaten and left for dead, Charlie. She'd been r-raped. By THREE guys."

The whiskey bottle fell from Charlie's suddenly nerveless fingers and only Embry's quick reflexes kept it from spilling all over the carpet. He squeezed his eyes tightly closed and shook his head like he simply couldn't accept that such a thing had happened to his amazing daughter. But he knew it was true, despite the lack of evidence. Bella and Jacob would NEVER lie about something so terrible. "She looks fine, though. How – how did you heal her? Is it a Werewolf thing?" Then he shook his head and held up a hand to indicate that he didn't want the answer to his question just yet, and pulled his daughter into his lap, rocking her gently when she began to sob.


End file.
